joehillsthrills:

Recently crossed paths with a pal.
I’m frowning because Neil only gave me one jar of his hunny and I knew it wouldn’t last and it didn’t.
He’s smiling because he knows all the rest of his hunny is safe: the hundreds and hundreds of golden jars of it he keeps hidden from the world and hogs for himself.

Look at us. We are masters of modern terror. We are so scary. Whoooooo we are so scary.
It is okay that you do not think we are scary. 
We do not mind.
We have honey.

joehillsthrills:

Recently crossed paths with a pal.

I’m frowning because Neil only gave me one jar of his hunny and I knew it wouldn’t last and it didn’t.

He’s smiling because he knows all the rest of his hunny is safe: the hundreds and hundreds of golden jars of it he keeps hidden from the world and hogs for himself.

Look at us. We are masters of modern terror. We are so scary. Whoooooo we are so scary.

It is okay that you do not think we are scary. 

We do not mind.

We have honey.

joehillsthrills:

The big takeaway from this Sunday’s New York Times Magazine article? McMurtry is now the most famous Welsh Corgi in America.
At least in the early going, celebrity hasn’t changed the typically easy-going pup.
"I still put my pants on one leg at a time," he said, when reached for a comment earlier this morning. “That’s a joke!" he added. “I don’t wear pants."
With that he resumed chewing on his favorite squeak toy, a long fuzzy green tube that looks vaguely like the Jolly Green Giant’s bloated phallus.
Advertisers and show business professionals looking to use McMurtry’s uniquely noble profile are advised to contact his professional representatives with Hotchkiss & Associates.

What I love best about this article are the people in the comments who have realised that actually Joe Hill is just a puppet pen-name for his dad who, frustrated by the failure of previous pen-name Richard Bachman, is secretly writing everything Joe writes. INCLUDING THIS TUMBLR.
I know. I shouldn’t read the comments. Nobody should ever read the comments. But don’t those people know that by posting the truth openly like that, they risk a visit from “Joe” and “Owen” and “McMurtry”? A very final visit…

joehillsthrills:

The big takeaway from this Sunday’s New York Times Magazine article? McMurtry is now the most famous Welsh Corgi in America.

At least in the early going, celebrity hasn’t changed the typically easy-going pup.

"I still put my pants on one leg at a time," he said, when reached for a comment earlier this morning. “That’s a joke!" he added. “I don’t wear pants."

With that he resumed chewing on his favorite squeak toy, a long fuzzy green tube that looks vaguely like the Jolly Green Giant’s bloated phallus.

Advertisers and show business professionals looking to use McMurtry’s uniquely noble profile are advised to contact his professional representatives with Hotchkiss & Associates.

What I love best about this article are the people in the comments who have realised that actually Joe Hill is just a puppet pen-name for his dad who, frustrated by the failure of previous pen-name Richard Bachman, is secretly writing everything Joe writes. INCLUDING THIS TUMBLR.

I know. I shouldn’t read the comments. Nobody should ever read the comments. But don’t those people know that by posting the truth openly like that, they risk a visit from “Joe” and “Owen” and “McMurtry”? A very final visit…

NOS4LISTWHO?

joehillsthrills:

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NOS4A2 entered the New York Times hardcover list at #5 and that makes me happy as a boy can be. Thanks so much for reading, guys.

(For those who are wondering about the asterisk, that’s there to indicate sales of NOS4A2 are essentially the same as the sales of the book above it. It also means that I hit my homeruns in the steroid era, but fuck it, everyone was on the juice back then)

I’m now halfway through the US/UK tour for NOS4A2 (NOS4R2 in the British Isles). I’m on the West Coast this week, beginning with an event Tuesday night, at the Mysterious Galaxy bookstore, in San Diego, at 7 PM. I’m looking forward to it: Sandy Eggo is home to IDW Publishing, my Locke & Key crew, and it’ll be nice to see my pals there. There’ll be a full run of California/Oregon/Washington readings and then I’m on to England for a string of events beginning with a talk and signing at Foyle’s in London on Tuesday the 28th. All tour info is here.

I have run my gob for a variety of online journals and magazines. I won’t link to all of ‘em, but here’s a good one I did with Complex.

And here are a few more reviews on the novel, good ones all. I’m not entirely opposed to linking to a really wretched one – that could be entertaining - but for the most part I’ve been lucky this go-around. If you’re hesitant about picking up the book, maybe summin’ in one of these pieces will sway you.

Damn, I’ve had so much good news lately, it’s like Christmas came early this year!!! God bless us… every one!

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This book is what I am saving to read on the tour bus, when I go a-signing in June…

joehillsthrills:

So this happened in 2012.
Yeah, you know, Barry likes to come over now and then, and we play action figures together. Of course HE always has to be Super-O.
Very very proud this man is our president.
My date, by the way, would be my incredibly, supremely, awesomely awesome mom, who ought to have an action figure of her own.

See? I said Joe Hill was here on Tumblr.
And I have met his mom. And, for the record, she is every bit as awesome as he says she is. 

joehillsthrills:

So this happened in 2012.

Yeah, you know, Barry likes to come over now and then, and we play action figures together. Of course HE always has to be Super-O.

Very very proud this man is our president.

My date, by the way, would be my incredibly, supremely, awesomely awesome mom, who ought to have an action figure of her own.

See? I said Joe Hill was here on Tumblr.

And I have met his mom. And, for the record, she is every bit as awesome as he says she is. 

joehillsthrills:

This was the first of several questions about Locke & Key I was asked to answer. The takeaway here is that my nostrils are fucking HUGE. I probably have the largest nostrils of any American novelist. As Mick Jagger is to lips, I am to nostrils.

I wish you weren’t so self-conscious about your enormous gorilla-like nostrils, Joe. 

I would like to request that anyone who watches this video refrain from commenting on Joe’s nostrils. Instead, buy Locke and Key.